Category: General

Events and Gatherings

March 18, 2023

WP Question: What makes you most anxious?

Events and gatherings make me anxious. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy going places and trying new things and revisiting old places, etc., but when it comes to scheduled events, I get super anxious, especially in places like the image above. That photo was taken in 2018 during oldest daughter’s national competition at the ESPN center in Disney World. It was a lot of fun being there, supporting her and the team, but it gave me a ton of anxiety just keeping up with the times they would perform (so I won’t miss them) and remembering the team’s schedule afterwards like pick up time, and dinner time, etc.

In general, anytime I have to plan an event, including things like making reservations, I get extremely nervous. I was always like this, even during undergrad and graduate school when presenting, and during the years I worked as a student finance advisor when I had to educate new students on financial aid. Years ago when my sister and I and two cousins created a Hmong dance group and performed at the Dragon Boat Festival and all over the city, I was super nervous. One time the camera man from the local news had the camera on my sister and I and asked me some questions but I just couldn’t speak up. I think my sister ended up doing the talking.

Strangely, I used to teach Catechism and I never got anxious. I believe I taught for about 10 years and enjoyed every moment of it. Maybe teaching isn’t so much an event or gathering. I’m not sure. I just know if I have to plan anything or attend a planned gathering, yeah I get super quiet and just want to hide.

You Made It!

March 13, 2023

Write a letter to your 100-year-old self.

Dearest Self,

How’s that rocking chair working for ya? I’m kidding. You don’t like rocking chairs. You like stillness, the sound of rain, the quietness of snow, and soft autumn winds.

You always knew life was hard and unfair. I think from the moment that little girl cut the chewing gum unfairly, giving you just barely enough when she gave herself and her other friend bigger pieces, you were aware that something was not right. You got the short end of the stick and for some reason, it was like a foreshadow for your future. You were maybe three-years-old, but that feeling remained. It’s strange how we remember these hurtful things that others forget, yet they too remember their own hurtful memories that others forget. Even you forget how you’ve hurt someone, but I’m glad you don’t deny it or pretend you’re too perfect to do anything like that. It’s recognizing our faults that make us human. It’s also not recognizing our faults that make us human.

The hard life and difficulties of life began from memories of your parents. You saw their struggles when you yourself experienced hardship. Only then did you realize what it meant to struggle. Instead of feeling as though these were battles you’d never win, you succeeded. You worked hard. And again, it was because you saw how your parents persevered and succeeded. I know if you were given the opportunity, you’d thank your parents. You’d speak their tongue so perfectly that you could eloquently explain to them how much they’ve done to give you the life you have now. They did their best and you’d tell them that.

It seems you don’t give yourself any credit. You want to thank your parents, your friends, your siblings, your spouse, your children, your teachers, your bosses and co-workers. It is always someone who did something for you to get you where you are. Will you ever give yourself credit? (LOL…no)

Well, I’m proud of you living to 100. Even though your goal was at least 1 billion years, 100 is pretty good, for a human.

XOXO

Life Update and Book Review: These Violent Nights

March 13, 2023

The book review is below this life update. You can skip and go directly to the review because it could be a bit depressing.

I’m currently playing catch up on my book reviews from the last year and before. There was a period in there when I was trying really hard to blog but my father had passed away in 2020 and thinking that I could handle it, I tried to keep going like everything was okay. But everything wasn’t okay. I just blocked all my emotions. I knew it was all going to catch up to me, I just didn’t know when and how.

In August 2020, my dad died unexpectedly from a brain hemorrhage. When he was in the ER with my youngest sister and wanted to see me (and one of my other sister–I have 3 sisters–he wanted to see all his 7 children, but at the time, only three of us were available) really badly, we sort of just told him that we’d see him later because they were running tests and stuff on him, but then it turned out, due to COVID, only one family member could be with him for the day. We also didn’t think much of it. Dad had gone to the ER before and it was always something easily taken care of. While driving back to our mom’s house, we chatted with Dad on video message. He was all hooked up but looked happy. He smiled at us and tried to talk. He was very happy to see us on video.

Later the same day, the doctor said they needed to perform an operation on his brain to relieve it from the hemorrhage but they had to send him to a different hospital where they specialized in the procedure. The next day he arrived at the other hospital and they performed the surgery. Our whole family was there including all our spouses and some cousins.

After the surgery, we were told that Dad was not going to wake up and that they’d keep him hooked up until we said our good-byes.

Three years later and I still miss him. I still dream of him (like this morning) and wake up thinking he’s still here. When he was alive, he’d often call me just to ask me how I’m doing, how my kids are doing, and how my husband’s doing. If I had missed his calls, he’d leave a message. I know it’s weird but I’ve kept all his voice mails. I don’t listen to them very often (just once since his passing).

Anyway, I hope I don’t weird anyone out. There was a moment I thought I should delete the messages, but I just can’t find myself to do it. I think just knowing I have a part of him still near me is comforting. I rarely go to the cemetery to visit his grave site. Having his messages on my phone means more. It reminds me of how he cared about my well-being.

For the last couple of years, I blamed myself. I kept telling myself I should have gone and seen him inside the ER. I should have found a way to switch places with my sister to see him. I was angry at the doctors and I was angry at myself. It was only after hearing on the news that another man had died from the same brain hemorrhage that I forgave the doctors and realized they did all they could. I don’t hold grudges so you can see how much weight that was to hold a grudge on them for at least a year.

I’m going to stop there. I just thought I should let this out because sometimes I think people see me as a robot because I don’t tend to share my feelings or emotions very much. And for the most part, I don’t get emotional really. It sometimes makes situations very uncomfortable.

Title: These Violent Nights
Author: Rebecca Crunden
Genre: Fantasy romance; Dark fantasy
Year Published: March 31, 2021

Date Started: September 27, 2021
Date finished: June 1, 2022

This is a dark fantasy that follows two friends through a dystopian world where an alien race, the Suriias, made their way to earth via a portal and destroyed most of humanity. The remaining humans were either turned into slaves or killed. The human world was completely taken over by this race and in order to survive the humans must remain hidden or else their lives would be completely controlled by the Suriias.

The story is split into three parts. The first part focuses on the two human friends, Thorn and Thistle. The second part tells the story of a human named Nik and Lucien (the Suriias in the first part). There is a love story between the two men. Their relationship grows slowly and eventually and ultimately becomes a full-blown relationship. The third part ties both of these stories together.

This was a great story. I really enjoyed it. The magic in this story was excellent. I liked that they had to hide their magic so most of the story was about the relationships between the characters. The world is very gloomy and creates a dangerous place to be. The backstories are done exceptionally well describing the aliens path to earth and the destruction of earth.  

Who should read this book: If you’re into fantasy mixed with dark future worlds or dystopian, this one is excellent.

Book Review: Heir of Ra

February 25, 2023

Title: Heir of Ra
Author: M. Sasinowski
Genre: YA Fantasy
Year Published: August 12, 2018

Date Started: February 7, 2023
Date finished: February 14, 2023

This is a story about a girl named Alyssa Morgan. Her father, Kade, becomes ill and she wants to find a cure for him. In doing so she meets up with some of her father’s co-workers and students where they head to Peru and a few other locations to locate an artifact that could lead to saving her father. There is also another group who are after the same artifact and will do anything to get their hands on it first. Eventually, they all end up in Egypt where the rest of the action takes place.

This is a pretty fast paced story. There are multiple characters jumping from one to another quite frequently. We never truly get invested in any one main character even though it’s mainly about Alyssa. However, I think this is the style of the writing. It feels a bit like a book I read from author, Lee Child some time ago. It’s got the same vague storyline and focuses more so on the setting rather than the characters. It’s a well written story though. I liked the action and the urgency.

Overall, this was a good story. If you’re into young adult that focuses less on romance and more on the action and working as a team to defeat the enemy, this would be a great read for you.

Who should read this book: Readers of young adult who also enjoy historical fantasy fiction.

Book Review: The Forgotten Kingdom

February 23, 2023

Title: The Forgotten Kingdom
Author: Signe Pike
Genre: Fantasy, Historical Fiction
Year Published: September 15, 2020

Date Started: January 19, 2023
Date finished: January 23, 2023

I think my expectations were too high after reading the first book, The Lost Queen, because this book was just okay. The story is told from three characters: Langoureth, Lailoken, and Angharad where Langoureth and Lailoken are in first pov and Angharad is in third. I found it quite confusing because without mentioning whose story we were in, in each opening chapters, I wouldn’t know which characters it was. The voices of each character sort of blended together as though it was one character. Even the third-person character felt like the two first-person characters. In the first book, we only got one pov and it was Langoureth’s which created a more focused story and was more interesting in that sense.

There was a lot happening in the story and nothing was very clear. It jumped from one character to another frequently so the full story sort of got lost. There was a war and there was tension. The story that stood out most was Angharad. I think for me it was because it was the most adventurous one. She was kidnapped and then eventually ended up being at the same place where her mother (Langoureth) was. Through it all, she became a stronger person.

Overall, I found this book okay. It wasn’t bad but it was a bit drawn out even though the chapters weren’t very long and the pacing was well done. The setting description/exposition was done well. The writing was just as beautiful as the first one. The action and war scenes were sort of muted. They didn’t seem strong enough or action packed enough.

Who should read this book: Read this book if you’re into historical fantasy fiction and if you have a liking for writing that makes you feel as though you can smell the fresh earth and feel the air of that time period.

Book Review: Atonement: A Magical Warrior’s Tale

February 7, 2023

Title: Atonement: A Magical Warrior’s Tale

Author: Fred. G. Baker

Genre: Fantasy

Year Published: January 12, 2023

Date Started: January 30, 2023

Date Finished: February 3, 2023

This story is about a man named Hunter. It begins with him in childhood and then ends when he’s in middle age. The story follows Hunter as he joins the military and begins to hear a cat speak to him. Shocked, he thinks something is wrong with him only to find out that he has a gift and that he comes from a long line of gifted family members. Hunter goes on living his life not thinking too much of how important his life is. He does stupid things and tries to avoid the voices only to continuously get closer to the voices. He never gives in and constantly remains speculative, but his fate was set to defeat creatures of the unknown.

I really enjoyed this story. At first, I thought it was simply a military story but as the story moved along the fantasy stuff set in and really hooked me. Don’t get me wrong, I love military stories. Just didn’t want to be fooled by the title which sounded very fantasy-like. As the story moved along and Hunter had to face the fact that he’s sort of the chosen one (without it being said) I was smiling because now I was invested in him. The story was action packed from Hunter’s days in the military to his life as a “simple” man. I also really enjoyed the dark humor and the mistakes he made in being careless, which is just to say, he was human. I really liked that aspect of him.

This is a great fantasy story with a main character that is relatable. I’m not a man but I can understand what he’s gone through from a human perspective. I really enjoyed this book and recommend it to all fantasy readers. It’s excellently written and paced just perfectly to keep you excited.

Who should read this book: If you’re into military and fantasy with a realistic main character, this would be a good read. The story is a bit fast paced and goes through time pretty quickly so keep that in mind.

Book Review: Moonlight Beach: Murder and Magic

January 20, 2023

Title: Moonlight Beach: Murder and Magic
Author: Yuri Kiri
Genre: Murder Mystery; fantasy
Year Published: May 14, 2019

Date Started:January 2, 2023
Date finished: January 6, 2023

This story opens up with a murder and the detective is having a difficult time finding who did it. Alongside this murder story is a story about a few women and men who are into doing special drugs and calling on spiritual beings. The two stories eventually converge with all the pieces coming together cohesively.

What intrigued me most about this story was the fantasy aspect of it. Even though I don’t often read murder mysteries, I’ve often enjoyed them. This one was no doubt a great murder mystery. I also found humor in the writing which I enjoyed as well. Adding the fantasy element to it was like the cherry on top. I personally have never read anything like this, or if I did, it must have been ages go. I love fantasy and this one didn’t disappoint.

Overall, this book was well written with strong characters and a pretty good plot. I think a little more focus/depth on just a couple of characters would also make the story even better. The pacing was on-point for this genre. There were things about this story that I felt was not believable, like the doctor simply accepting the lung donation from the father of the child needing it. I had to really think about that. I have no idea how organ donation is done in real life (the actual process), but I have the feeling it’s probably a little more complex than showing up to the doctor with an organ. But you know, I did enjoy the idea of just being able to do that. The overall theme and conflict were nicely done. This is definitely a fun read and would be well worth your time.

Who should read this book: If you enjoy murder mystery with a bit of dark humor and fantasy, you’ll like this one.

Book Review: Dear Edward (Feb. 2020)

January 19, 2023

Dear Edward by Ann Napolitano is about Edward. He is the youngest of a family of four who survived a plane crash. The story touches on a few of the passengers on the plan who died in the crash. At first it may not seem important but at the end, the relatives and friends of these people come forward to share their stories with him with a few asking for his help.

Edward befriends a neighbor girl and they grow together with the girl helping him through tough times.

This was a happy ending story. Napolitano said it’s based on facts from a real-life situation. I’m glad that the story turned out to be a happy one.

Note: I read this book for the Barnes and Noble Book Club in February 2020, just before COVID hit. I don’t know why I didn’t post it here, but wanted to share it because a T.V. show has been made about this story. It will air on February 3rd on Apple TV+. I don’t have Apple TV+ so I won’t be able to watch it, but it does look like it’d be a good show. Here’s the trailer.

Year in Books On Goodreads and Top 5 Favorites

December 31, 2022

I’m not ready for 2022 to end yet, but it is coming to an end, and it’s time to share my list of books read and favorite books of the year. I didn’t do this last year or the year before but figured I should start doing this just as a way to keep track of what I’ve read as well as to share with you in hopes that you might find something that interests you.

You can read all my reviews on Goodreads by going here.

Here are my top favorites by genre:

Sci-fi:

Anthem by Ayn Rand

Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir

Fantasy:

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by V. E. Schwab

General Fiction:

Bartholomew by Mark Lages

Nonfiction:

The Combat Diaries by Mike Guardia

My all-time favorite was Anthem by Ayn Rand. It wasn’t a very long read yet was able to tell a well-rounded dystopian story about power struggle and self-identity. My least favorite read was probably Tender is the Flesh by Augustina Bazterrica. I’ve reviewed it on Goodreads but didn’t get a chance to post it here. I hope to post all the books I read this year here within the first part of 2023.

Cheers, and have a wonderful New Year!